


I Didn't Know That I Was Starving (til I tasted you)

by LadySlytherin



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Derek Hale is Bad at Feelings, Emissary!Stiles, Intoxication, Laura is amazing, M/M, Mistletoe, Misunderstandings, Sort of Dub-con, Sort of Underage, Spark!Stiles, TFLN inspiration, alive!Hales, but also not really, but not really, magical!Stiles, wolfsbane alternative for getting werewolves drunk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-27
Updated: 2016-12-27
Packaged: 2018-09-12 17:49:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,481
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9082987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadySlytherin/pseuds/LadySlytherin
Summary: Derek - who lives in New York with his older sister, Laura - is back in Beacon Hills, visiting his parents and younger sister for Christmas, when everything changes. Cora invites friends over while their parents are visiting other family, Derek drinks something he didn't know he shouldn't have, and things get a little out of control.
Misunderstandings abound, secrets are spilled, and in the end all it takes to find happiness is being brave enough to reach out with both hands and never let go.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is alive!Hales and based on a TFLN post (funniest website I’ve ever been on), both of which are firsts for me. Six year canonical age gap between Stiles and Derek; Stiles is _slightly_ underage in this. Huge thanks to A and K for their read-through; any remaining mistakes are, as always, my own. I can never seem to stop editing.
> 
> This was my contribution to a tumblr Secret Santa exchange, and as-such is shorter than most of my stuff, but I hope it's enjoyed regardless. ^_^
> 
> Comments thrill me, and feel free to drop me a line over on Tumblr!
> 
> ~ Sly (everything-a-wolf-could-want over on Tumblr)

Derek woke up slowly, as he always did. The first thing he registered was scent - himself, and his pack, and the little things that told him he was home in Beacon Hills rather than in his apartment in New York. There was something else, too…something familiar but not, that was saturating the air around him. His hand twitched and encountered smooth skin. Derek’s eyes flew open, flaring blue for a few seconds before he could clamp down on the shift, and he took in the messy hair and pale skin that was only a few inches from his face. Deep, even breathing came from the body next to him and Derek felt sick to his stomach even as he pulled back and took in the beard burn on that smooth skin and the hickies turning into bruises in a couple of places. He knew that dark, tousled hair…the long line of that neck…the moles that dotted all of the bare skin he could see, spread out across his childhood bed.

_Stiles Stilinski._

Carefully, Derek slid out of the bed, stomach twisting further when he realized he was naked. He studied Stiles - the long line of his back marred by thin red welts and faint bruises; the way the sheet was clinging to what was apparently a _very_ firm ass; the way his nose wrinkled in his sleep as he shivered and turned over, burrowing into the warm spot Derek had left behind on the bed. Derek quickly snatched up a pair of sweatpants and pulled them on, dropping his cell into his pocket before slipping out the room, just in case his mom or Cora needed him while he was having a nervous breakdown in the woods. Less than a minute later, he was out the front door and running across the clearing surrounding the house, towards the trees. He hit the treeline and shifted before running full-tilt through the trees.

Derek remembered getting to his parents’ house the day before. He remembered his mom and dad kissing him and his little sister goodbye before heading out to visit Uncle Peter and his wife and kids for a week. They would all return to the Hale House in time for Christmas Eve. Derek was left in charge of Cora - at nearly twenty-three, he was considered responsible enough to handle her - at least until Laura flew in, in a couple more days. Cora had asked to have a few friends over the second Talia was out of earshot, pointing out that a couple of them were actually new pack members Derek was going to have to meet eventually anyway.

Derek slowed to a walk, then stopped completely to sink down on a fallen tree, shifting out of his beta-form at the same time. He noticed his hands were shaking and wished he could make it stop but, for the first time since he was a teenager, he felt wildly out of control. He remembered the house being taken over by a group of teenagers - six? Seven? Eight? He wasn’t sure - and he remembered Cora enthusiastically pushing a white soup-mug into his hands, enthusing over the _’_ special hot chocolate _’_ one of her friends had made. Derek had taken a sip and been surprised by the spicy flavor…cinnamon and something _actually_ spicy, with licorice undertones to the creamy chocolate. It was _good._ Derek drank the whole mug - large as it was - in just a few quick swallows. He remembered asking one of the random teenagers, whose name he hadn’t caught, for more…remembered drinking it…remembered…

Remembered nothing else, actually.

Except that wasn’t _really_ true. He remembered…hands, pushing under the soft fabric of his henley. He remembered nails dragging down his back, and a slim body beneath him, and smooth skin that tasted _so_ good, and long legs curled around his hips, pulling him close. He remembered his name tangled up with moans and gasps and pleas for more and the feel of his claws and fangs dragging over that pale flesh, determined to mark it up, and dear god Derek was suddenly terrified he’d wolfed out and given them all away to a random human but that wasn’t even the biggest issue. He knew without a doubt that he was remembering bits and pieces of what had been him apparently sexing up the Sheriff’s kid, who he had a sudden sickening feeling was still underage - at least for a few more months - and the worst part wasn’t what he _could_ remember, but what he _couldn’t._

Derek couldn’t remember how Stiles had wound up in his bed. He also couldn’t remember who’d made the first move, and while he prayed it hadn’t been him he figured it probably wouldn’t matter to the Sheriff - or _Talia_ \- either way. He couldn’t remember if they’d even actually had sex - penetrative or oral - or if they’d just frotted or exchanged handjobs. And sure, that was all semantics, but they were semantics he _needed to know_ because those were the details that might mean the difference between a pair of handcuffs and a bullet when the Sheriff found out what had happened. Derek groaned and scrubbed at his face, jumping when his pants suddenly vibrated.

Derek pulled his phone out and stared at the message from Laura.

**Big Sis:** _**yo bro, cora said u took off. U ok?** _

Derek deliberated for a moment, then sent back a quick text in the hopes Laura would have some sage advice or sisterly wisdom to impart.

**Derek:** _**woke up to my little sister’s best-friend’s boyfriend in my bed, but how’s your saturday going?** _

Derek’s phone rang only a few seconds later and Derek sighed before accepting the call. “Yes, Laura?”

Laura’s voice was sharp in his ear, tone blisteringly disapproving even through the phone. “Are you freakin’ kidding me, Der? You slept with _Boyd?”_

“What?” Derek frowned, struggling to put a face to that name and finally coming up with the quiet, dark-skinned teen who’d been glued to the blonde girl - Erica’s - side all night. Both teens were new members of the pack and so Derek had made it a point to try to remember them. “No, why the hell would you think that?”

There was a pause, then Laura’s bitingly sarcastic voice drawled. “Because Erica and Boyd are dating, and Erica is, arguably, Cora’s best friend.”

Derek didn’t know how to respond to that other than to say softly. “I thought Lydia Martin was her best friend. She talks about her more than the others.” When Laura burst into raucous laughter, Derek couldn’t help the pout that formed on his lips. “Shut up! Cora and I don’t really talk much, okay? What am I missing here?”

“Jesus, Derek, you need to pay more attention.” But Laura’s voice was fond, albeit exasperated. “Lyds and Cora are, like, _a thing._ Sort of. It’s not officially-official, or anything, but near enough to it at any rate. Who’d you think Lydia was dating, anyway, Jackson? Cause he was with Danny, last I heard, but Jackson isn’t a cheater so I’d guess they’ve broken up if he let you bone him.”

“First off, I have better taste then _Jackson Whittemore.”_ Derek snarked, feeling a little prickly and defensive all of a sudden. He’d been mostly focusing on the _‘I slept with someone who’s taken.’_ aspect for the last few minutes and now that he knew Stiles wasn’t dating Lydia, he was left with the whole _‘I slept with someone underage and very likely wolfed out on them.’_ thing instead. “Second off, I…I thought she was with that other guy. Um, the one Cora’s weirdly close to and Mom thought _they_ were dating for a little while until Cora said they weren’t.”

Because somehow he couldn’t quite bring himself to say a name, as though that would make it more real. As though it was something he could pretend hadn’t happened if he just ignored it for long enough.

When Laura spoke again, there was a funny note to her voice. “Wait…Derek, did you…did you sleep with Stiles? Is that what you’re saying right now? I…Derek, _Stiles?_ Oh my god, I can’t…Der, I…” Derek cringed and braced himself for recriminations and disapproval and maybe even anger, already sick with guilt over taking advantage of _the Sheriff’s son._ Laura’s next words, however…

“Holy shit, bro, good job!” Laura laughed, loud and delighted.”Man, I wish I was there already so I could high-five you, but I’m totally doing it the _second_ I get to the house. God, Mom’s going to be _thrilled._ So, why are you on the phone with me instead of snuggling up with Mr. Teenage Awesome?”

“What?” Derek felt like his brain had somehow leaked out of his ears while he was sleeping. Nothing was making sense anymore. “Laura, I just told you I slept with the underage son of the Sheriff. Why the hell are you _congratulating_ me? This isn’t a good thing! Not to mention I can’t remember most of last night, but I’m _pretty_ fucking sure I shifted at some point while I was with him.”

There was another pause, then Laura said. “Did you drink hot chocolate last night? It would’ve been sort of spicy, and tasted like chocolate-covered licorice.” When Derek made a soft sound of assent, Laura sighed heavily into his ear. “Yeah, okay. Do yourself a favor, Derek. Go talk to Stiles. And for the love of everything, stop beating yourself up, okay? Be happy for once. I’ll see you Monday, bro.”

“But I…” Derek groaned as the call cut off. _“Bitch.”_

He slipped his phone back into his pocket, then glanced towards the house. Laura usually knew what she was talking about, but…did he really want to go back and face this? And if he didn’t, what was the alternative? To go back to New York and never visit Beacon Hills again? To hope Stiles never told anyone the werewolf secret? To hope Stiles never told anyone Derek had slept with him while he was underage? Pack and home were _everything,_ and it didn’t matter how much this sucked because Derek was going to have to face it sooner or later. Might as well be sooner, then. Pushing to his feet, Derek started back through the trees, albeit much slower than earlier. He wasn’t exactly in a hurry.

By the time he reached the front steps, Cora was standing on the porch and frowning at him. _“There_ you are. We were worried. I didn’t realize you were still doing morning runs. Laura said you’d mostly stopped.”

Derek cleared his throat awkwardly. “Right. I, uh…needed to clear my head.” He hesitated next to his sister, then asked softly. “Do you know where Stiles is?”

“In the kitchen, making breakfast.” Cora grinned, then rolled her eyes. “He’s such a mother hen sometimes, but it’s actually really sweet. Don’t tell him I said that, though.”

Derek slowly followed Cora through the house, towards the sounds of laughter and teenage chatter and cooking emanating from the kitchen. She ran ahead of him the last few feet and skidded around the corner into the room, leaving Derek standing in the hallway, alone, trying to muster his courage. The sound of a howl had his heart missing a beat before picking up the pace. He rocketed into the kitchen doorway and froze, trying to understand what he was seeing.

Cora had picked Lydia up bridal-style and was the one with her head thrown back, howling at the ceiling, clearly in delight at having “captured” her…girlfriend? - Derek wasn’t quite clear on that, but close enough - while Lydia giggled and grinned like a maniac. Erica had her claws out and was slicing fruit with them, occasionally tossing a piece to Boyd, who would shift long enough to catch it in his mouth before shifting back to chew more easily. Isaac was sitting at the table, talking to Danny, papers that looked like homework spread out between them. Jackson was draped over Danny’s back like a cape, chin on the other teen’s shoulder, looking half-asleep. Two teenagers he couldn’t readily identify - one male, one female - were assembling plates of toast, eggs, bacon, sausage, and fruit, moving easily around each other as though they’d been doing it for years. The boy had dark, floppy hair and an uneven jawline while the girl had a sweet, heart-shaped face and long, dark, curly hair that was pulled into a messy ponytail.

As Derek stood there, gaping, Stiles was busy cooking an absolutely insane amount of food. Eggs that were passed on to the two teens doing the plating, waffles he was stacking on a platter next to the waffle-maker, and something that smelled like peppers and onions and mushrooms that was being sauteed in another pan on the stove. Out of nowhere, Erica threw something - Derek thought maybe it was a peach pit - at Isaac, hitting him in the back of the head. He whipped around, eyes flaring bright gold as he bared fangs and snarled at the girl. Erica shifted into a fighting stance and snarled right back, her face shifting between one heartbeat and the next. Derek took a half-step forward, ready to get between the two newly-turned betas, but quickly found it unnecessary.

Stiles whipped around and threw out a hand, slamming Isaac back into his seat and Erica back up against the counter. His eyes were bright - not glowing, not quite, but almost as though they were faintly backlit - and the air in the kitchen seemed charged with electricity all of a sudden. “Not. Over. Breakfast.” Stiles bit out, giving both of them stern looks. “My kitchen, my rules. You want to fight, you go outside _, and_ you don’t get to eat anything I’ve cooked. We clear?”

Erica and Isaac both nodded. “Sorry, Stiles.” Isaac sounded sheepish and apologetic, and he gave Stiles a puppy-dog look. “I’ll behave. Promise.”

Erica rolled her eyes, but grinned at Stiles. “Sorry, Mama Bear. Didn’t mean to make you growl and snap.”

“I’m hardly a bear.” Stiles pointed out, turning back to the stove and the waffle-maker on the counter next to it. “I think I’d like Mama Wolf better, but Talia really deserves that title more than me.” He paused for a second, then added. “Are you guys going to greet Derek, or are we acting like heathens instead of the well-mannered pack you’re expected to be? And Derek, you shouldn’t lurk in the doorway. As Ursula says…it’s rude.”

Derek flushed as everyone turned to stare at him, still lurking as he was, and chirped a dutiful chorus of hellos and good mornings. “Morning.” Derek replied gruffly, still trying to figure out what was going on. Decided the best way to get answers was to ask for them, he added. “Stiles, can I talk to you? Privately, please.”

“Not sure how private we can manage with _this_ group in the house…”Stiles wiped his hands on a dishrag, then nodded to the unknown girl. “Allison, can you and Scott finish up, please? Hopefully this won’t take long, but don’t feel obligated to wait before eating. Just save us some.”

“Of course.” She kissed Stiles’ cheek as he passed her, adding. “For luck.”

Jackson laughed and taunted. “Pretty sure he’s already gotten lucky.”

Stiles raised his hand and wiggled his fingers at Jackson, blue and gold sparks dancing around them. “Be polite, Jacks, or I’ll shut that mouth of yours for you.”

It was to the sound of laughter that Stiles curled long fingers around Derek’s wrist and pulled him from the kitchen, out into the hallway, saying. “Your mom’s study is soundproof, so let’s just go in there, okay?”

Derek was about to explain he didn’t have a key to it when Stiles laid a palm on the door and the lock clicked loudly while disengaging. “That’s…useful.”

Stiles just grinned and tugged him into the room, shutting the door and leaning against it. “So, what did you want to talk about, big guy?”

“I…” Derek had no idea where to begin, and his mouth wound up forming words before his brain had a chance to really consider them. “What happened last night?”

Stiles blinked, straightening away from the door with a frown. “You don’t remember?”

Derek shrugged helplessly. “Bits and pieces.I remember Cora giving me something to drink, and Laura seemed concerned about it when I talked to her this morning. I remember…” Derek paused for a moment, but forced himself to keep talking. “I remember kissing. Touching. I remember you, underneath me, on my bed. I know I woke up next to you this morning. I…don’t remember most of what happened during all of that.”

“Derek…” Stiles swallowed and Derek listened to the sound of his throat clicking. “How much of that hot chocolate did you drink?”

“Two of those big soup mugs.” Derek admitted, still not understanding what the hell had been in it or why it was causing so much concern. Stiles’ sweet, enticing scent had gone sour and unpleasant around the edges and he hated it even as he wondered at the cause.

“Oh my god…” Stiles looked torn between horror and tears. He brought up his hands, fisting them in his hair even as his eyes scrunched closed, his mouth twisting sourly. “Fuck. Fuck, fuck, _fuck._ Deaton’s going to kill me. Fuck that, _Talia_ is going to kill me.” Stiles eyes opened wide and he fixed Derek with a desperate, pleading expression. “I swear I didn’t know how much you’d had, Derek. I _swear._ I would _never_ have taken advantage of you like that. I had no idea - fuck. Fuck me. I shouldn’t have - I’m sorry. I - I’ll go.”

Derek had a moment to be amazed at the way Stiles had said all of that in a hurried rush, without once pausing to take a breath before the teen was opening the door. Derek stopped him by slamming his hand against the door, pinning it shut and caging Stiles in by bringing up his other arm, palm against the wall on the other side of Stiles. “I still don’t know what happened last night, or what I drank, or what’s going on. So. No running off until you explain a few things, okay?” When Stiles nodded, wide-eyed and mouth slightly open in surprise, Derek added. “Also, I don’t think anyone’s going to be blaming _you_ for what happened last night considering you’re the one who’s underage. I should never have touched you, and I…I don’t know why I _did,_ but…I’m sorry.”

“You were drugged.” The words tumbled out of Stiles’ mouth as though he couldn’t stop them, and he bit his lip afterwards, looking miserable and a bit afraid.

“Drugged. Like…like wolfsbane?” Because clearly Stiles knew a lot about _their_ world, so what was one more spilled secret - weakness or otherwise - in the grand scheme of things.

Stiles shook his head quickly. “No! God no, wolfsbane makes you hallucinate. Fuck, no, I’d never give you guys that stuff, ugh. No, it was anise. Well, an anise-liqueur. And like, cinnamon and vanilla bean and a chili, but like..the anise-liqueur is the part that drugged you. I…anise is like, like catnip but for canines. And you guys _are_ kind of canine, and I…yeah. It was just supposed to help everybody relax. Like being tipsy. No one was supposed to have _that_ much of it…”

“No one told me what was in it.” Derek admitted, and he dropped his arms, taking a small step backwards. His heart sounded loud in his ears - or maybe that was Stiles’ heart, he wasn’t sure - and he felt a numb sort of detachment from everything. “I…I could have _hurt_ you, Stiles. I wasn’t in control, I…I _shifted,_ and…”

“Derek, I could blast you on your ass if I needed to.” Stiles laughed and it was nervous but there was something hopeful on his face and in his voice. “You…you aren’t upset? That I…I mean, that _we…”_ Stiles cleared his throat, then looked away for a second before bringing those whiskey-colored eyes back to Derek’s face.

“You deserve to know what happened.” Stiles took a steadying breath, then began talking. “There was mistletoe hung in a couple of places. We bumped into each other under some it, and you laughed. Then you kissed me. I was surprised when you didn’t seem to want stop, but definitely not complaining. We kissed for a few minutes and then you nuzzled my throat. You said….you said I smelled amazing and you…you wanted me. I…” Stiles’ voice broke a little and he looked away before whispering. “I’m sorry.”

And Derek _hated_ the miserable look on Stiles’ face almost as much as he hated the way his scent had gone dark and sad. Stiles smelled like the earth, and growing things, and sunlight normally; like spring in the forest and wildness and just a hint of rain and wind and lightning that Derek realized now was the spark of magic in Stiles’ blood. It was a happy scent, and an enticing one. But Siles was young, still in high school and not legally of age and the Sheriff’s son on top of it all. And Derek, he had killed the only human he’d ever let get close to him and he was almost twenty-three and he lived in New York and…and it was crazy. This whole thing was crazy. He shouldn’t feel a pull towards this boy; shouldn’t want to wrap him up in his arms and keep him safe; shouldn’t want to _claim_ him. It was all too much, too fast…too _everything._

Derek opened his mouth, fully prepared to tell Stiles he was sorry for whatever had happened the night before, but it could _never_ happen again. “Your dad is going to kill me for having sex with you.”

Stiles’ head snapped up, and he said in surprise. ”We didn’t have sex. We…we touched, and kissed, and you sort of rubbed your stupid beard all over me - a scenting thing, right? - and there was some definite, um… _mutual enjoyment_ that happened, but our pants were still on for that part! You stripped us afterwards to sleep, but we didn’t…you know, _do that._ You said…you said not until my birthday. Which is in a couple of months, by the way, so not that far off. And, like, Dad’s used to me running around being involved in magic and stuff. I don’t think an older boyfriend will really set him off.”

“Your dad knows about us.” Derek’s voice was flat. “Does _everyone?”_

“Of course not.” Stiles rolled his eyes, his shoulders relaxing a little. “But I’m a spark, and a future emissary, so of course dad had to be filled in. Talia handled that last year when I started training with Deaton. Allison is an Argent and got brought into the loop on her eighteenth birthday, last year, though she’s not an active hunter. Scott’s the next up for being turned, because his asthma is really bad. Like, it almost killed him a few months ago, but your mom wants to wait until the other three are more settled before turning him, so Scott’s mom knows, too. Lydia is a banshee, plus she and Cora are like…you know, _together._ And Danny’s family are wolves - the Mahealanis - and Jackson got brought into the know sometime over the summer. I don’t know when, exactly, but yeah. He wants the bite too, but Talia says he’s not ready for it.”

“Do you want the bite?”

Stiles blinked, then laughed, shaking his head. “You can’t turn a druidic spark, Derek. It kills us.” Stiles gave him a fond smile. “Your sisters said you don’t pay a lot of attention to things, but I thought they were exaggerating. I guess not. But no, Derek, I don’t want to be a wolf. I like being human.” He grinned wider, and sparks danced around his fingertips for a moment before he added. “Well, you know… _mostly_ human.”

“You…” Derek hesitated, then decided to take Laura’s advice for once and try _being happy._ “You want to catch a movie later? Maybe get some dinner…”

A slow smile curved Stiles lips and he stepped in closer to Derek, asking teasingly. “Are you asking me out on a _date,_ Derek Hale?” Derek nodded cautiously and Stiles’ smile bloomed wider. “Then yes, I would most definitely like to see a movie and have dinner with you.”

Derek couldn’t help grinning as Stiles’ arms slid around his neck and a long, lean body pressed into his. He lowered his head to catch Stiles’ mouth in a kiss. Just as their lips touched, someone banged loudly on the door and they jerked apart in surprise. Stiles scowled and spun around in Derek’s arms. He waved his hand towards the door, causing it to spring open and reveal Cora, hand poised for more loud knocking.

“What?!” Stiles demanded, narrowing his eyes at her. “I’m _busy_ here.”

“Food’s ready.” Cora said cheerfully, adding. “And also, Laura called and told me to make sure no one was killing anyone else. Everything all sorted out?”

“Yes.” Stiles replied, his face smoothing into happy lines once more. Derek tightened his grip on Stiles’ waist and the teen relaxed back into his chest with a happy little hum. “We’ll be there in a minute, Cora. Go supervise the others, please.”

His sister rolled her eyes but obligingly wandered off, though she left the door open. “Why do they all listen to you, anyway?” Derek asked, because it had been niggling at him since the scene in the kitchen.

“Because I can trap them with mountain ash if they annoy me.” Derek laughed, and Stiles tipped his head back and to the side to grin up at him. “Yeah, I feel the same way about it. But it means Talia usually expects _me_ to enforce the rules when she’s away, so I’m just sort of used to being the one holding their leashes, you know? I do it without even really thinking.”

Derek huffed in amusement even as he nuzzled into the bared expanse of Stiles’ throat, murmuring. ”I’m going to get sick of the dog jokes real fast, aren’t I?”

“Probably.” Stiles pressed a kiss to Derek’s cheek and added. “I promise I’m worth it, though.”

As Stiles pulled away and headed for the door - no doubt intent on breakfast if the quiet rumbling of his stomach was anything to go by - he shot another teasing smile at Derek over his shoulder. And Derek was suddenly quite sure that Stiles was absolutely right. Stiles was _definitely_ going to be worth it. And Derek couldn’t wait for him to turn eighteen.

_**~** _ _**Fin** _ _**~** _


End file.
